I couldn’t get up last night.
I wanted to come and write something to You, Abba… but You had pinned me down.
I couldn’t get up… and I didn’t want to.
I was lying down on the couch, covered with a soft blanket. Taking a “cat nap.” Except it was Skippy, our dear cat, who was napping. Right on top of me.
Her little, warm body was hugging mine. Leaning into me. Melted into me. In complete abandon. With complete trust.
It was a picture of You and me in that very moment… wasn’t it, Abba?
In my mind, I was all set to jump up and “do” something for You. To post some words of love to You here. But I knew doing so would wake Skippy up… breaking our connection.
How could I do that, Lord? When in that moment, we were… one?
Isn’t that the picture of how You want us to be with You, Lord?
Leaning into You? Hugging You? Melted into You with complete abandon? Complete trust? Just being together? Not breaking our connection with You, our being one with You…
… even to go and “do” something for You?
I have been a Type A, driven, over-achiever for much of my life, Lord. Proving myself and protecting myself. Sometimes You have to remind me that it isn’t my doing that matters most to You.
It is my being.
“Be still, and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10)
Because You desire my heart.
“I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” (Jeremiah 31:3)
And You have my back.
The Lord Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.” (Psalm 46:11)
Last night, You sent Skippy to me… as Your furry messenger.